Insignificent speck

I need someone to confide in, at the very least to converse with. Watching, waiting, depreciating. I'm growing moldy and patches of fungus are covering my heart thats shriveling up. So empty I don't even have words. I've lost myself. I don't know what I am. Where is my place on the earth? Nowhere. Tiny speck of matter who robotically makes her way through life. No nourishment for the heart or soul. Blue with the lonely-bug. Empty, numb, drained. Silent, silent, silent, silent, silent, silent, silent, silent, silent, silent. My emotions don't matter to anyone. I think im dying

Life ain't a game

-Choking on all my contradictions, need to regurgitate them back up and spit them out and discard them. Need to throw away the key with bodily fluid on it and construct a new one. Fresh new one untainted with perverse and wicked notions.

Then you'll be free right?
Freedom is always so goddamn out of reach

Like trying to get one of those sonofabitch stuffed animals out of one of them blasted machines, yet, I still waste every goddamn quarter I've got. But, I wont let it be phoney or a bunch of baloney, cause life, it ain't a game.